I've been vaguely ill for about a month now, but I think that 3 doctors later, we may finally be on the path to a solution, even if I am still exhausted. Having had an extra nap today though, I think I now see why we have so many problems with our early intervention team. It's all about perspective.
We look at Acorn and see a child, whole and complete (with extra hardware, of course, but still, we see him as a unit, tubes and all). We see how far he has come. We see the everyday miracles - who knew breathing was so hard? - and the not so common ones (like a child so tiny his eyes were fused shut, learning to open them). We see his triumphs as proof that his weaknesses are improving. We see a child who communicates, even without words...and we see how ecstatic he is to communicate clearly when he manages to sign. We celebrate a child who nearly died (more than once), who is now happy and mostly healthy.
They look at Acorn, and see tubes. They see a child who didn't sit, crawl, or walk on time. They see a child who doesn't talk. They see a child who has not spent time around other children, and they believe this means he isn't "properly socialized." They see his faults, his weaknesses, and see his history as a tragic tale of things gone wrong. They see him as a disconnected set of broken parts, forever scarred by his experience, and inherently unhealthy because of it.
They see the holes. We see the process of building the skyscrapers that will one day cover the holes.
Its no wonder we don't see eye to eye on where he's going and how to get him there.
That's a really important insight!
ReplyDeleteI wish they didn't see the tubes first. :(