Every now and then, someone talks about how we need to take care of ourselves to take care of our children. Shoot, I've even said it.
Still, it's often difficult to figure out where to carve out time for self care in the midst of what feels like an over-scheduled disaster....even though Acorn has fewer appointments than this time last year. I think part of the problem these days is that Acorn is at an age where he needs consistency...and getting him to bed has been a major challenge, so we have to be home by 9, and we're usually just getting home from work at 6.
Our solution, to some extent, is a standing Thursday night pattern: one of us takes Acorn to gymboree, the other takes off for the night. For my husband, it's his evening with his girlfriend; for me.....there's less structure.
And that is both good and bad. For a while it was an appointment with my counselor, and then a massage. Then my massage therapist fell off the face of the earth, and then I quit therapy...and then it was writing for a while.
This week I'm just in a funk, and I'm realizing that part of my issue is that while this schedule gets me out of the house....it's very isolating. I need time to myself, I need time with other people, and having a standing night for being out means that I can't take into account what I need most right at that moment - there's no time to plan for a change in plans.
Last night I went and got dinner, and went for a massage at a Chinese reflexology and acupressure place that takes walk-ins. Interestingly, they were playing Native American flute music, which is a change from their norm. Not as grounding as acupuncture, but a good start.
So....I think I need to get back to building meditation time in to my days. Or doing yoga or something - there's a new yoga place just a mile down the road. But meditation is shorter, and less expensive, and doesn't require packing up a bunch of stuff and heading off somewhere.
And I need to build more social time into my life. Not that I'm a terribly social person most of the time, but there's a point where I've spent too much time sitting in my little self-imposed exile.
I just don't know how to balance this. I have no idea. I need more sleep, and I need time for all this stuff, and time to play with Acorn, and time to fight over his IEP....can I clone myself?